Fantastically Flawed

My work week started today with a poignant reminder of the fragility of life. I sincerely doubt that anyone who reads this doesn't know what my job is, but just in case, I'll remind you that I teach PreK at a learning center with kids ranging from 6 weeks to 12 years of age.


As I entered the office to sign my time sheet, our bookkeeper was quietly and sadly telling another staff member that over the weekend, one of our children had died. She was new to the center - an infant who had only been in our care for a week or so prior. She wasn't at school Friday because she was sick, but they only planned to give her a breathing treatment and thought she'd be fine. We were expecting her to return today. Her big brother is in the class below mine, and he was back at school today, as the family attempts to keep something stable in his life.


The most heartbreaking - Dad tried to go into her classroom today to pick up her things... He fell apart. Tears streamed down his face the moment he walked in. We would never have expected him to do that today, not so soon. On our cribs, we post pictures of the babies sleeping, and their names, so that a teacher helping in the classroom will know where the sleeping baby in their arm belongs. Her picture hadn't even made it to the crib yet. A frame was sent home today with that picture in it. We feel helpless. It wasn't in our care, but she was ours.


I've been here for 4.5 years and we've never lost one of our own - it's hard. The center was somber today, as we went and attempted to carry on with our normal schedules and activities. None of the parents know, of course. And despite the overwhelming feeling of sadness, the heartbreak I know I would feel so much stronger if it had been one of my kids - I can't help but feel such a sense of gratitude for what I know. She's only gone ahead - she's one of the righteous ones, to be here on Earth for less than a year - she must have some work to do! I hope her family gets the comfort they need... I hope they have the strength to make it through.

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I do have a lot of things going on in my life right now that I will update the blogging community on, but I need things to settle a bit more first. I know I've been absent, but don't worry... It's coming!